Some stuff doesn't make it in the column I write for Decider. Most of the time it's due to space/length concerns or I'm not making any sense. Probably the latter.
So if something doesn't make the cut that I felt was particularly witty, I'm going to post it as a bonus. Bonus may be too strong a word. Yard clippings may work better.
This paragraph hit the editing room floor and I felt it was appropriate if you plan on following Mark Sanchez in the NFL next season. It would have been the second to last paragraph:
See? There you go. I did it now too. How does Sanchez deal with his name being associated with such a spirited act? The good looking, athletic QB looks like the last person who would perpetrate such a cowardly denouement on a sex partner, yet he will be saddled with the label by internet cretins every time he fucks up. He might as well just adopt a finger wipe across the upper lip as his signature move every time he throws a touch down because if he can’t control it, he might as well make it his own. Yes, kids all across America will be doing a new touchdown celebration this fall that will make T.O.’s antics seem quaint and tame.
SOLID GOLD! I know someone is going to break this out next year and I wanted to get my name down as the genius who came up with it first.
JR
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Friday, April 24, 2009
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Jock Itch: The Rockies ad it up
just in case you're still coming here:
http://denver.decider.com/articles/the-rockies-ad-it-up,26876/
http://denver.decider.com/articles/the-rockies-ad-it-up,26876/
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Reidy @ Decider Denver
If you can't get enough of me and want to read some fresh new stuff, I've started to write a weekly sports column at Decider Denver.
Decider Denver is the local content offshoot of the Onion here in Denver.
I'd like to take all the credit for being brilliant but Jason Heller does a bang up job of making me seem competent. Enjoy, and let me know what you think.
Jock Itch @ Decider
Decider Denver is the local content offshoot of the Onion here in Denver.
I'd like to take all the credit for being brilliant but Jason Heller does a bang up job of making me seem competent. Enjoy, and let me know what you think.
Jock Itch @ Decider
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
National Novel Writing Month
I'm currently hammering away on my novel for National Novel Writing month.
You can chart my progress and read an excerpt here:
http://www.nanowrimo.org/eng/user/428593
This is a competition to see if you can bang out 50K words in one month. So be kind when reading the excerpt, I have not edited a thing. But then again, if you like it, then that's just the brilliance of me.
You can chart my progress and read an excerpt here:
http://www.nanowrimo.org/eng/user/428593
This is a competition to see if you can bang out 50K words in one month. So be kind when reading the excerpt, I have not edited a thing. But then again, if you like it, then that's just the brilliance of me.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Predictions for Next Week
I predict that before the election, gas prices will dip drastically low.
Here in south east Denver, I have a gas station I go to where it's now close to $2.50 a gallon.
My prediction is that by next Tuesday, gas prices will get to $2.15 a gallon. Why? To fool people into voting for McCain. The thinking will be "hey, gas is back to what it was a year or two ago...things aren't so bad right? Right?"
Well they're still bad. And the completely arbitrary and staged fluctuations in gas prices are not indicative of how crappy things are.
So here's my other prediction: Once Obama is elected, gas prices will jump back up and will hit $3 a gallon by the next week or two. Why? Because the dip in prices is an illusion and once the need to artificially lower prices is over, they'll go back up to where they want them. And it makes Obama look bad.
It's all smoke and mirrors.
Eliminate our need for foreign oil? Great idea. But how about eliminate our need for oil all together?
It's very peculiar that Cadillac just came out with a Hybrid in the last month. The last month? Really? So, they didn't have the means to make one until gas his $4 a gallon? Amazing how that happens.
Push our dickhead politicians for alternative energy not just alternative oil sources. At least when I'm being lied to I like to have the illusion that someone is actually giving a shit.
So in closing, punish those responsible for the last eight years by voting Obama next Tuesday. And get ready to pay out the ass yet again at the pumps once he's elected.
Ass, grass or cash. No one rides for free.
JR
Here in south east Denver, I have a gas station I go to where it's now close to $2.50 a gallon.
My prediction is that by next Tuesday, gas prices will get to $2.15 a gallon. Why? To fool people into voting for McCain. The thinking will be "hey, gas is back to what it was a year or two ago...things aren't so bad right? Right?"
Well they're still bad. And the completely arbitrary and staged fluctuations in gas prices are not indicative of how crappy things are.
So here's my other prediction: Once Obama is elected, gas prices will jump back up and will hit $3 a gallon by the next week or two. Why? Because the dip in prices is an illusion and once the need to artificially lower prices is over, they'll go back up to where they want them. And it makes Obama look bad.
It's all smoke and mirrors.
Eliminate our need for foreign oil? Great idea. But how about eliminate our need for oil all together?
It's very peculiar that Cadillac just came out with a Hybrid in the last month. The last month? Really? So, they didn't have the means to make one until gas his $4 a gallon? Amazing how that happens.
Push our dickhead politicians for alternative energy not just alternative oil sources. At least when I'm being lied to I like to have the illusion that someone is actually giving a shit.
So in closing, punish those responsible for the last eight years by voting Obama next Tuesday. And get ready to pay out the ass yet again at the pumps once he's elected.
Ass, grass or cash. No one rides for free.
JR
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